December 27, 2016


1:18 PM EST


Here's a really out there thought.. maybe all our heroes are dying in 2016 because now that Donald Trump is president and the forces of evil are gaining strength, God needs to call in some favors and create a new army of angels to work for the rest of us.


1:20 PM EST


Hatred can change a life, but love can change the world.


5:41 PM EST


When Carrie Fisher died, my childhood didn't die, it was gilded in the gold of loving memory. The heart's own Kintsugi. Find the treasure in life's scars... remember what Leonard Cohen said... "There's a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in."


6:14 PM EST


We're all sittin' here like, all our childhood heroes are dying... now you know how your parents, your grandparents feel. Stop indulging in self pity... we got it good, give love, this is all a cycle.


December 26, 2016


7:15 AM EST


While I completely agree with the idea of seek and ye shall find, my rational, logical, grounded side must always ask the question, is it perhaps not simply confirmation bias that finds what it seeks? And ultimately, all I can say the answer is, if you find it, and it changes you, does it matter as long as it improves your capacity to love?


9:14 AM EST


The truth about going through Hell. Hell is the suffering of one who feels remorse about either something they've done, or seen in this world... it is part of the path towards light and compassion... it is not about the duality of running from Hell and chasing Heaven... all is part of the same growth cycle... perhaps no one can avoid Hell, but you can get through it. 


December 24, 2016


3:39 AM EST


The brain is a machine capable of great thought, great problem solving...adaptability, making nuanced, subtle, fine tuned connections... but we must take care of the whole machine that is the body, a strong but fragile ecosystem, in order to make that machine function at optimal levels... or at all... in a way we are all mechanics... we are all gardeners... and likely other professions saying the same thing in their own relative terms...but the point never changes... the addage is true: You must love yourself before you can love another. Only lit candles can alight another.


6:55 AM EST


Becoming a man isn't what they tell you... oh I've always known you don't become a man at 13. There are milestones but they come when we are ready, when we learn fundamental lessons, when we act like a man, only then are we a man... Every undefinable era of my life has demanded something different from me and sometimes I failed, and sometimes I loved well, saved lives, protected something beautiful... and now my life calls on me again to be better... and so I will whittle away more, and I will be brave, and I will do my work, thankful to have it, and I will work on the gift of my love and my music, if I am worthy of inspiration's wing...


4:58 PM EST


The religious kill witches because witches are more confident in their delusions than they are in their own.


December 23, 2016


3:57 AM EST


Miracles are the Animalcules


They say when it rains you can buy an umbrella, or be like me and run around in it because it's family, but I digress. They say you can protect yourself physically. You buy a helmet, and insurance... but how does one protect one's spirit? The spirit is neither protected by money or what money buys, they say the spirit is protected by faith. They say faith is the only true shelter... and what is faith? Faith is having complete trust. And how is our spirit protected by faith?


Well, What is the difference between the spiritual armor of faith, and the Chinese discipline of Qi Gong? Doesn't all faith require specific practices? In Judaism there are acts, they call them mitzvahs... so many schools of thought, perhaps all talking about the same thing, just in different words, utilizing different rituals... and when faith is not enough to protect the spirit, there is a miracle.


A miracle is an event not explicable by natural or scientific laws. When the music box Mike's mother gave him many years ago in our dining room that had not been wound in over 10 years started playing by itself, the afternoon we were sitting together talking about her, and friends who have passed, RIP Richard Dimond... was that a miracle? Was that a sign? That yes indeed we are living in a virtual reality of interconnected interdependency, and all separation is merely an illusion?


7 billion drops of water make a pretty powerful ocean, don't you think? But don't discount the cats, dogs, birds, fish, everything that lives, they're beautiful droplets reflecting prisms of love and light as well... or perhaps a miracle is a combination of unforseen but perfectly explicable variables coming together to produce an outcome, like delicious food coming out of an unseen and microcosmic kitchen, dealing with causes and effects and nothing more? And thus the necessity of miracles does not necessarily produce them... hence, God works in mysterious ways, listens, but the answer isn't always yes... perhaps not so mysterious after all?


And what of the synchronicities? Why send the messages at all, if all for naught? Perhaps that too is just how we're wired... or more virtual reality curtains showing a bit too much of Oz... Whatever the truth is, there appears to be a need for faith, for ritual, for community, for hope... for transcendence.


8:52 AM EST


Ultimately, it matters not what anyone else thinks... the treasure you find is perhaps for you alone.


9:16 AM EST


The senses are the primary colors of the body. The grand machine. And in the same way a painter blends colors to create a painting, you too must learn to blend your senses to create a world.


December 19, 2016


7:44 AM EST


Deep thought is judged as judgmental by those who mistake a whole world for a hole in the ground.


8:26 PM EST


Beliefs are the junk food of faith... every attachment to belief builds a small construct of safety for the mind against that which it fears, which is why people will believe in just about anything... but true nourishment comes not from belief, but from honesty, clarity, reason, and achievement.


Identification with beliefs is attachment.


December 18, 2016


6:15 AM EST


The human body is the only edifice that is both a temple and an amusement park. And yet, sex in a church or carnival is right out. I can't make heads or tails of it! Being alive is extraordinary.


December 13, 2016


9:52 AM EST


Just Looking


i look for the posts that have no likes.
i look for the imdb stars who have no posts.
i look for the stars beyond tv.
i look for the spirit within all things.
i look for God within the dream.
i look for beauty that overwhelms me.
i look for a path through subtlety.
i look for the flower growing through the cracks.
i look for the living light which nothing lacks.
there will always be that which we think we are seeking that we ever never hope to catch.
the trick to mortality is to learn how to laugh.
i find all these things like birds in the clearest sky.
to catch them one must merely become as open wide.
i do not have the answers, and that is the answer.
it is better to know one does not know then to know one knows,
for only in open fields does beauty grow.


December 9, 2016


4:19 AM EST


The art of our lives must be more valued than convenience... only then will beauty transform our world.


December 8, 2016


11:44 PM EST


The thing about ignorance is when those with a deeper perspective in an area try to enlighten others, since their ignorance stops them from seeing a problem with their behavior, it is like waving to someone standing on ice... they can't hear you, and can only see you if they look. Most people are too certain of their point of view to look around, too busy watching the inflight movie of their own conclusions.


That is the only reason why enlightenment is so rare... it is our natural state, but people are not willing to open their heart in the face of another's suffering they cannot see, so they continue on self assured...


The key is compassion and active listening to one another... we must not grasp how we want to see things, more than our desire to solve for X, where X is that which separates the hearts of man.


December 7, 2016


5:01 AM EST


Some long for the beauty of possession, finding neither beauty or that which endures. True beauty is fleeting, something which inspires yet distant as a bird. A touch whose love restores, not in the grasping but in the loosening of grips, not in the sudden gush or gesture, but in the softly subtle silent sips... a hummingbird once visited to the face, whose quality hears more in the soft refrain... there is a longing here i hear it roll i know it's stroll... it knows not the journey but the desperate goal... David Bowie bled it in Blackstar, and I here reflect it ... funny how light makes everything seem to go faster, it is because we long for its destinations to lead us home... we close our eyes not to escape the light but to create a beautiful contrast upon opening them again. People take for granted everything but i don't. Every nuance every morsel every atom and every space between them, sacred and endless... every breath is cashmere thread in the tapestry of our lives, and we weave our emotions and intentions into the memory of the cosmos. Akashic infamy or dissolution. If I am loved or I am lost. Blessed either way.


1:53 PM EST


I have a $100 turntable cos it was a very generous gift and I can't afford something amazing right now... but I love it, and I customized it to be even better... believe me, when I play a $300 LP on it, I don't worry, I think, it's just marrying up.


December 3, 2016


1:03 PM EST


I don't try to be perfect or to master indulgence.. being very pleased with balance and a display of kindness and compassion. For gratitude is the shadow of solace.


December 2, 2016


2:50 AM EST


We all need catharsis
We all need patience, and a reflection of light in the land of darkness
A place to rest our heads, and cool the hate of the heartless
To turn the pages of yesterday's sorrows
Oh how love is vanquished in the gulf of tomorrow
Innocence turns ramparts and walls washed away in the dream
May love comfort and let the sun that shines in your window
be seen...


~Jonathan Berman


12:36 PM EST


Don't be ashamed of that my Lord
That's just what you needed
That's just what you needed
That's what got you fat
Now be inspired and re-wired
and let the light shine in you again.


~Jonathan Berman


December 1, 2016


8:47 PM EST


An ex-friend of mine tonight made a post asking if anyone knew about TMS, she's very depressed and is willing to try anything. I didn't know what TMS was, but I wanted to let her know that I am there for her, so I replied, I don't know what TMS is, but what sometimes helps me is to seek a balance of work with passion... so I do the best I can to make a living, and treat my customers honestly and kindly and make them happy, and then try to focus on my passions, like music, art, chess, cooking, friends, family and community... etc... and I find when I feel most balanced in this endeavors, I feel better about myself and my life... also by focusing on gratitude in the present, I worry less about the past and the future, and can be be there more for those I love, which helps with stress and depression...


Her immediate response was outrage. She couldn't believe I would say such a thing... this hurt her feelings so deeply. She said I was assuming she should be able to handle her depression by herself.

I responded, I don't believe anyone can do it alone, notice I did mention community, friends, family, etc...

This only outraged her further...


I truly don't understand what I did wrong, in fact I don't believe I did anything wrong, except try to reach a friend going through a hard time.


I feel ultimately, if she would respond to someone so angrily, perhaps she should take a break from social media, and reconnect with nature and her deeper passions in her life... it's easy to get caught up in expectations of society, and get buried under it all, that we lose our balance and joy...


Some of you know who I mean... Kacy, and apparently Mike Seeba is as usual convinced I was being judgmental and playing the victim, and basically I'm a horrible person in his eyes... and hers I guess...

But I ask you... if I am awful for trying to help a friend, because I love them... is communication just impossible between some people? It sucks when people just don't hear your heart, and aren't open to sincerely caring and trying to help someone... resulting in loss of friendship... especially old friendships like these...

But if I do my best, I suppose it's out of my hands...


I don't think I'm perfect, but I know I did nothing wrong. Perhaps some people will never be able to see that. Somehow I'm being judged while being accused of being judgmental... but I made no judgments whatsoever, I just tried to help a friend.


I guess in the end she wasn't exactly willing to try anything... usually the first step is listening with intent to grow, and learn, not to be offended... that defensive posture is a brick wall that will keep you from growing. Keeping everyone out you want to let in... utterly counter-productive, and unfair to those who love you.


10:25 PM EST


To all the psychopathic asshats (just kidding i love you) who unfriended me in 2016: Thank you for leaving my life to make room for amazing people I might not have met otherwise... and to you, I wish you no ill will, nor hatred or lack of compassion, only that you find what you are looking for, in love, happiness, and patience to self and others... be the parent and the child to your own soul... I am not to blame for unsuccessfully trying to love you.