November 30, 2016


8:51 AM EST


I used to wonder why so many men don't grow beards, and then it occurred to me... as I vowed to not shave my beard, that it takes a lot of flexibility of mind and patience with discomfort to grow a beard... it goes through so many itching phases, different spots grow at different speeds, a sense of boundaries are tested, temperatures, and our mortality becomes a very real passenger as we reflect upon our own self with the overgrowth of our own world, and the ebb and flow of impermanence...

A man's natural state is to to grow and refine, perhaps to trim, but not to shave... it also gives me a greater appreciation for why cats want to be pet around their mouths so much... for them it is their glands, but as a man, it is a relief as well...

It can also make a man look older, it reshapes the face, which can help create a more pleasing illusion because those who look tend to imagine what is pleasing to the eye, and fills in the blanks accordingly... a beard can also be a creative statement of style and personality.


7:56 PM EST


We live in an age where you can't say anything about women without being labeled a sexist, you can't say anything about blacks without being labeled a racist, you can't say anything about republicans without being labeled a democrat, you can't say anything about democrats without being labeled a republicans.


Our world has become so polarized, that communication has completely broken down. We are being driven into consumer camps of thoughtless lack of introspection, deserts of overamped emotion in a spiritual void.


The only solution is to return to silence, return to nature, return to the grace and solace of the calm quietude within the storm... forgo reaction, listen completely, love compassionately... sacrifice entertainment and convenience... breathe, meditate... attend and restore sanity to the soul.


8:14 PM EST


Every time i hit 400 Facebook friends, I am contractually obligated to say something to fuck it up.


November 29, 2016


9:12 AM EST


One's philosophy is just a confession of his/her own diseases: there are no transcendental philosophical ideas, just subjective perspectives developed by one's life.

~Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900), Ecce Homo ©1908


9:29 AM EST


I am never offended by those whose difference of opinion contradicts my own... it is only those who attack my own who seem to think I am.


9:45 AM EST


The lovers lay in bed, cozy and warm, wrapped up in each others arms and eyes... he asks her, what do you want to feel tonight, what you're feeling or what I'm feeling? She smiles, sighs, and says... "both".


11:51 AM EST


When times get tough, there are two certain medications. One is to be the creator, the other the listener... in such dark times, I either play a favorite song, or sing one...


12:42 PM EST


To me, the difference between analog vinyl and digital music is summed up like this: With digital music I always feel like I'm waiting for something to happen, and with analog, it's just happening... there's a deeply visceral, physiological satisfaction I feel with analog that digital simply cannot give to me.


November 28, 2016


5:50 AM EST


Are there things we do not see, not because they are not there but because they exist within a vibratory framework we have not clicked into? Whether higher or lower... who is to say realms of infinitely dangerous beings, psychological master manipulators, yetis and unicorns, ascended masters and aliens, ghosts and monsters don't dwell in realms beyond our immediate perception? They as unaware of us as we of them? Many have visited realms in which they interacted with unusual geometric beings, and light masters through the use of meditation and psychedelics...


“Once upon a time, I dreamt I was a butterfly, fluttering hither and thither, to all intents and purposes a butterfly. I was conscious only of my happiness as a butterfly, unaware that I was myself. Soon I awakened, and there I was, veritably myself again. Now I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly, dreaming I am a man.”

― Zhuangzi, The Butterfly as Companion: Meditations on the First Three Chapters of the Chuang-Tzu


I had a similar dream, where I was my kitten... and finally, remember... it is not the answers you find here that matter, only that you are willing to entertain the questions...


"There's a chamber that doesn't open, but with a niggun..."


Time to find my library card to the Akashic Records.


6:03 AM EST


Someone interprets criticism as a smart ass, but a wise man sees all criticism as constructive and learns from it... only fools waste their experiences.


November 27, 2016


1:30 AM EST


The light powers all the darkness.


12:28 PM EST


In America, women are treated more like desserts than entrees or God forbid, equal company at the same meal.


November 26, 2016


7:44 AM EST


I have a feeling, friends and family will relate with this story... heck, in their minds, I might be the person referred to...


It took me many years to realize that a friend is someone who gets what you're saying, or at least is open to your explanation... and those who scrutinize how you say it, and don't believe the explanation aren't really your friend... a friend wants to keep the conversation going, not find ways to shut it down... because I had people in my life I considered close friends, who fell into both categories, and I'm the type of person who will endlessly try to adjust for others. And I recognize that any behavior I point out, I likely exhibit on some level as well... we are all fallible human beings.


I have always been somewhat of an idealist, and my Bodhisattva sensibility meant I don't close the door on a path forward with anyone... but as I've grown up, it's become clear that pearls to swine is a thing... you cannot reason with unreasonable people, and some won't love you no matter how often you meet them 100% of the time, in their favor... these people I've had to let go, and to find peace with the knowledge that this type of relationship simply wasn't healthy for either of us. Sometimes caring means walking away.


I bring this up because a friend of 25 years, I've recently had to just let go their own way... for many years they interpreted my thoughts in pretty much the worst way one could, and it always confused me... because no explanation made them see who I really am, and if someone sees you in such a bad light, why are they even your friend in the first place? It became a sort of gaslighting, because they kept convincing me that it was all me, so I was always the one who tried to change... and I did change... but they never did... and that's why the relationship is also not healthy for them... I became an enabler for their behavior... luckily, it happened so often that others started to see how they treated me, and it became clear they treated everyone this way, so I could take a sigh of relief, it really wasn't all about me.


But, I do take responsibility that it was our dynamic, and I fed into it because I didn't understand, and I was sensitive and vulnerable, and I always try to be understanding. Right to the end I tried to compromise, but he could never see that, it was always all me... that's when I knew I had to walk away. I've been through so much in my life, and grown so much, I could not be manipulated anymore. I know when interpretations are incorrect, and if one cannot hear me, they don't deserve to have my energy.


Just remember, if someone constantly makes you feel bad about yourself, or seems to be attacking you and calling it a "difference of opinion", trust yourself... you know if that's true or not. I have differences of opinion discussions with people every day, and they're never combative, they never make me feel bad about who I am...

A friend wants to walk the path with us, recognizes we are vulnerable, fragile, amazing as they are... and spends more focus loving you, than judging you.


November 22, 2016


7:56 AM EST


I do not debunk in order to disappoint you. I do not harbor such feelings of negativity, rather I debunk in an effort to help people have the clarity of truth to walk through life with their eyes wide open, to avoid error and accidents.


November 21, 2016


2:15 AM EST


I believe I just discovered a major flaw in the religion of Islam... think about this... Islam vehemently opposes idol worship, and yet they all pray facing the greatest idol of all, a man-made temple... that to me would symbolize the greatest idolatry of all... if God is everywhere, it truly should not matter in which one faces externally... all that should matter is where the heart faces within.


November 20, 2016


4:59 AM EST


Six years ago I talked about Trump and his taxes, his bankruptcies and screwing over investors, and being a really corrupt guy... I remember it well because I was playing RIFT online at the time and got into a discussion with some people about him because he was being sued by investors and it was in the news... I brought it up on Facebook and no one cared. Now he's the president, and the talk is everywhere. It's a curse to realize shit that early, and it happens to me all the time, always has, all my life... the ideas I've brought up so often chastised for, become champion and credited to someone else years down the line... it's a blessing... and a curse. I'm not bragging, it sucks to see the future, be hated for it, and disregarded when it comes to pass because no one remembers you were shouting about it years before. I imagine I know how all those people shouting about Big Brother 60 years ago felt when it turned out to be true... sadly, most of them were likely dead before we realized they were right... now some might call this Dunning Kruger, but I guarantee you it is not, because I do not feel superior in my knowledge, only validated, and in so perhaps I too will listen close to the still small voice within, and together we can traverse these new waters we find ourselves simmering...


November 19, 2016


8:02 AM EST


When did memes become outside the rule of scrutiny? I tell you, many might read them as a joke, but I guarantee on some level, people do often believe them... that is exactly why they find them funny, because they on some level often do believe them... I hate when I question a meme and people reply, I just thought it was funny, or, it's just a meme! Memes are casual ways to dumb down the public by exploiting their ignorance in humor. Not all memes are innocent, many spread ignorant conclusions agreed upon by an uninformed public. I will never feel bad for applying intelligence to ignorance. A meme is not beyond the reach of questioning or it's really no different from any ignorant religion, that demands its book is the word of God, and we know that to be true because it says so... once you place anything beyond the reach of scrutiny, you create tyranny.


I find plenty funny, unless it's trying to spread misinformation, than I feel the truth should be pointed out.


 I know you think I'm taking a joke too seriously, but I don't trust everything I see as innocent... so I err on the side of caution as I feel needed.


3:46 PM EST


Sometimes I wonder if this is simply confirmation bias, other times I am assured this is true... when you try so hard to reach certain people and ever only wind up bruised, you start thinking, maybe it is true... say your piece and get out... explain nothing except where curiosity is recognized as true, and not simply a guide to tear down. Trust your ability to discern between the two with compassion and right effort. Throwing pearls to swine is a real thing. Some cannot hear you no matter how much you compromise, they are only satisfied if you give yourself away, but I believe in myself too much to make myself a door mat ever again, and it wasn't an easy road to get here.


November 17, 2016


3:28 PM EST


Walked by the dog while eating a slice of pizza, and I smiled... and I started going up the stairs and stopped... and thought to myself... what are you doing? So I turned back around, and gave Abbe half my slice of pizza... we all deserve a little surprise of thoughtfulness now and then, right? Gotta express that love.


3:58 PM EST


A lot of the stuff people post on social media, what people should do is:


1. Want to share something that just happened
2. Ask yourself, does this need to be shared?
3. Tell yourself, don't share it, just live it.


We have cultivated a way of life that is too much time spent as spectators of our lives, and I think when we overshare, it's because we're afraid to accept that some things truly are just for us, to digest, and cultivate ourselves, because it reminds us that we are ultimately alone, and we are left to face our own mortality...


But think of these moments not as lonely moments, not as selfish moments, but as the simmering pot of your own soup you plan to serve up in the expression of your love and friendship later on... in some other form... You must first cultivate the formless, before you can manifest the form.


Think on these things...


November 15, 2016


7:45 AM EST


Liberals lamenting the end of America, and I'm here with my silver lining feather pen throwing up my arms, well, it's probably for the best. A country founded on the murder of a centuries worth of native americans was no good from the start anyway. Like a relationship founded on lies, what did you think, karma only affects the poor?


8:41 AM EST


I imagine if God had a voice, she perhaps sounded like Audrey Hepburn... her voice like edible silk... not wrathful but loving and kind... it melts steel, and cools the fires of hell.


10:30 AM EST


You'll know the state of the Union by the state of my beard. On the night that Trump was elected, I vowed not to shave until I liked what I saw of his presidency and our future... I am asking you to take my word for it, err.....................wait... what? Why am I asking you to take my word for it? That's insane... I'm changing my mind right now... I'm changing my vow... I am not shaving my beard until I have reached my goal and moved to San Diego to be with Linda.


November 14, 2016


10:49 AM EST


When I speak of 2016, and every loss perceived...


Those who've died most dear to me, are the ones I'll be remembering. My sister's husband Yankel, who left her with four young children.


My cat Neptune who died in my arms looking out the open window. David Bowie died on the 10th, a starman that's true... but Neptune died on the 11th, and with him a part of me too.


I learned so much from Bowie in life, but much more from that cat. And when you and I console each other about this year someday, looking for silver linings in the clouds. I'll know my heart has only been made bigger, by the ones who loved and left me here, to ponder on it all, the tide coming in and going out... not a hello, not a goodbye... nor a hug that comes and goes... but a quality that persists, and a love that ever grows.


9:29 AM EST


Family is where you read the joy in someone's words and don't think, I don't care about this topic, you think, I'm so happy for your joy.


Family is where you read the suffering in someone's heart and don't think, I don't care about this topic, you think, I'm so sorry for your pain.


Now lets realize that we're all family, shall we?


November 13, 2016


3:01 PM EST


What's wrong with humans, you ask? We just got these thumbs and went crazy.


2:58 PM EST


A friend of mine attacked me for an hour until I asked him to stop acting like an asshole, at which point he became offended that I called him an asshole... I then spent the next few hours as always, trying to see his side, and compromising, of which he was completely incapable of respecting on any level... so I unfriended his ass.

I don't think I have all the answers, but I know what I deserve as a human being, and I will never be manipulated by fake friends ever again.


2:42 PM EST


The problem and solution of the 2016 presidential election and why people are so confused by it, even me... is that we forget that we live in a hall of mirrors. People fly from one blue city to another. Only converse with like-minded individuals primarily, or moderately... and thus never really recognize that what they're experiencing is just the smallest slice of our country, but since it's all they filter and process, they think it's the majority outlook... well, we found out, that simply is not the case... of course for years I tried to wake people up to this fact by pointing out that this is the nation of the patriot act, of citizens united, of corporations in bed with govt, of trickle down, of gun toting, consumption, indulgence and self absorption... lack of appreciation of education and healthcare by those in power... this is a country by and for Republicans essentially... and Democrats are not losing the country, we lost it 30 years ago, and we will never get it back... this is not the country of love and acceptance... this is not the birth place of utopia... we're in the wrong fuckin' place if that's what we want.


November 12, 2016


10:45 AM EST


I know my mind so well, that I will not take ownership of unwarranted skandhas, unless it first passes through all elements of rigorous, honesty self inquiry, and I stumble into its loving arms.


10:32 AM EST


Time to change gears... revive our passion in culture, in protecting it and each other's loves and our stories, and its glories... be well my friends.


November 9, 2016


6:21 AM EST


Just remember, the story of David and Goliath, or Job... now is when faith is tested... though we walk through the valley of the shadow of death, we will fear no evil... for God is with us... and for those who don't believe in God... remember, we will rise to the challenge, light will never be defeated by darkness, I am emboldened, galvanized in the cause for righteousness... we sit beneath the soil with the seed pods... and they need our strength in order to bloom... we must be the love and the light... think of those who died in the Holocaust, we must stand for them... think of those who despair... we must take their hand... we may have lost the political battle, but the war has just begun.


There is no amount of darkness that can be piled on me that I cannot shine a beam through... except maybe a black hole, those things are pretty badass....