May 4, 2018

 

I never get a big head when someone likes a post of mine, because I assume they liked it to subtly tell me I had a grammar mistake that needs fixing.

 

May 14, 2018

 

Linda once told me that she doesn't know why, but she loves chess players but isn't into chess.. and I now look back on that as possibly the most honest thing anyone's ever said, and perhaps even a little courageous. And what I mean by that is that I can relate that to my own life. I grew up an avid reader, and now at 45 I can honestly say I haven't read a book in years, but I love books and what I've gotten from them and how they've helped me to grow a whole world inside myself that helps me in hard times... so like Linda I can say, I love books but not that into reading anymore, and I think, why couldn't I have said that to Linda when she was alive? Well, because I didn't put the two together at the time, but now, looking back, yeah, Linda was that honest and she was that courageous. And goddamn do I love and miss the fuck out of that woman.

 

May 17, 2018

 

For those who have loved and lost, the idea of it getting easier over time is a double-edged sword. We know it's true, but a part of us fears it as we see getting easier as a sign that our connection to our love is fading and that guilt begins to not replace the pain but infect it and that is no good either, and perhaps, like me, you look for ways to simplify the table of all things that distract from the diamond of our love within the darkness, like an osyter finding the pearl within the spec of sand... perhaps we create projects to dig our way out of ourselves and into the expression of our love that pervades.

 

May 20, 2018

 

In the dark there is no difference in beauty between the moth and the butterfly.